Divine Heritage

What is it that causes us to forget that we are children of God? It happens to everyone at some time in their lives as they lose their way, make wrong choices or become fearful and doubting of their abilities and worth. The fact remains though, that we are from divine lineage. I am always touched by the simple and commonly used children's hymn "I Am a Child of God". We have a loving and caring Father in Heaven who wants the very best for us. Just remember that the next time you feel down on yourself or all alone.

“Of all the creations of the Almighty, there is none more beautiful, none more inspiring than a lovely daughter of God who walks in virtue with an understanding of why she should do so, who honors and respects her body as a thing sacred and divine, who cultivates her mind and constantly enlarges the horizon of her understanding, who nurtures her spirit with everlasting truth” (“Our Responsibility to Our Young Women,” Ensign, September 1988, 11).

“Live up to the great and magnificent inheritance which the Lord God, your Father in Heaven, has provided for you. Rise above the dust of the world. Know that you are daughters of God, children with a divine birthright. Walk in the sun with your heads high, knowing that you are loved and honored, that you are a part of his kingdom, and that there is for you a great work to be done which cannot be left to others” (“Live Up to Your Inheritance,” Ensign, November 1983, 84).

Fact or Fiction?

“Soul mates” are fiction and an illusion; and while every young man and young woman will seek with all diligence and prayerfulness to find a mate with whom life can be most compatible and beautiful, yet it is certain that almost any good man and any good woman can have happiness and a successful marriage if both are willing to pay the price.

There is a never-failing formula which will guarantee to every couple a happy and eternal marriage; but like all formulas, the principal ingredients must not be left out, reduced, or limited. The selection before courting and then the continued courting after the marriage process are equally important, but not more important than the marriage itself, the success of which depends upon the two individuals—not upon one, but upon two."- Spencer W. Kimball

THE FORMULA for a Happy Marriage:

1. A proper approach toward marriage. The selection of a spouse who reaches as nearly as possible the pinnacle of perfection in all the matters which are of importance to the individuals. And then those two parties must come to the altar in the temple realizing that they must work hard toward this successful joint living.

2. There must be a great unselfishness.

3. There must be continued courting and expressions of affection, kindness, and consideration to keep love alive and growing.

4. There must be a complete living of the commandments of the Lord as defined in the gospel of Jesus Christ.

"With these ingredients properly mixed and continually kept functioning, it is quite impossible for unhappiness to come, misunderstandings to continue, or breaks to occur."

Happily Ever After

Growing up children are constantly bombarded with ideals of "Happily Ever After" and girls look forward to their wedding day more than the actual marriage it signifies. "Many of the TV screen shows and stories of fiction end with marriage: “They lived happily ever after.” We have come to realize that the mere performance of a ceremony does not bring happiness and a successful marriage. Happiness does not come by pressing a button, as does the electric light; happiness is a state of mind and comes from within. It must be earned. It cannot be purchased with money; it cannot be taken for nothing.

Some think of happiness as a glamorous life of ease, luxury, and constant thrills; but true marriage is based on a happiness which is more than that, one which comes from giving, serving, sharing, sacrificing, and selflessness.Two people coming from different backgrounds learn soon after the ceremony is performed that stark reality must be faced. There is no longer a life of fantasy or of make-believe; we must come out of the clouds and put our feet firmly on the earth. Responsibility must be assumed and new duties must be accepted. Some personal freedoms must be relinquished, and many adjustments, unselfish adjustments, must be made.

One comes to realize very soon after marriage that the spouse has weaknesses not previously revealed or discovered. The virtues which were constantly magnified during courtship now grow relatively smaller, and the weaknesses which seemed so small and insignificant during courtship now grow to sizable proportions. The hour has come for understanding hearts, for self-appraisal, and for good common sense, reasoning, and planning. The habits of years now show themselves; the spouse may be stingy or prodigal, lazy or industrious, devout or irreligious; he may be kind and cooperative or petulant and cross, demanding or giving, egotistical or self-effacing. The in-law problem comes closer into focus, and the relationships of the spouse to them is again magnified." -Spencer W. Kimball

Perhaps it's important to take a little responsibility for our happiness and marriages and let the happily ever after start here and now by the choices we make, realizing it's a long journey ahead.

Fatherhood

I absolutely love this video. Father's are so important in their children's lives. The importance of mothers is stressed so often that sometimes we forget how critical Dad's are as well in the shaping and development of a child. Research literature supports the finding that a loving and nurturing father improves outcomes for children, families and communities. Recent research results show that fathers who live with their children are more likely to have a close, enduring relationship with their children. Other results show that children with involved, loving fathers are significantly more likely to do well in school, have healthy self-esteem, exhibit empathy and pro-social behavior, and avoid high-risk behaviors including drug use, truancy, and criminal activity. (fatherhood.gov)

The Love Languages

Many people have heard of the 5 love languages that every person naturally has a need for and gravitates toward. In order for our basic needs to be properly met, they must be shown to us in the category we need the most. Everyone has a love language that falls under these primary categories:

Words of Affirmation

Quality Time

Receiving Gifts

Acts of Service

and Physical Touch.

Visit: http://www.5lovelanguages.com/assessments/love/ to take the love language assessment and find out which language speaks to you most effectively. This assessment can be helpful for couples, children, and teenagers.

Ten Easy Acts of Service

1. During cold months while spouse is showering, throw a towel in the dryer so it's all fluffy and warm when they come out.
2. Domestic and household chores (e.g., cleaning the bathroom and kitchen are big winners).
3. When you're walking on the side of the road with her, be a gentleman and move over to the dangerous side of the road so she feels protected.
4. Fixing things that the other can't fix.
5. Buy or make him or her lunch and bring it to her/him at work, even if (especially if) it's out of your way.
6. Cooking a special meal that you know he/she likes.
7. When your spouse fills up your gas tank without being asked.
8. When you are out and your spouse drops you at the door because it's raining.
9. When husbands open car doors.
10. Going to the grocery store and being sure to get items you know he/she loves-without being asked.

Suggestions for Making Marriage Work

1. The Savior must be central in the home. To really succeed marriage must be centered in Christ.

2. Do not feel that disagreements in your marriage indicate that it cannot succeed. Nearly every happily married couple has 10 irreconcilable differences.

3. Never laugh at your spouse in private or in public.

4. Allow one another to reach your full potential. Do not smother each other with excessive restrictions.

5. Complement one another sincerely and often. Wives and husbands tend to become the persons described in the compliments their spouses give them.

6. Never resort to not speaking to each other. There are moments of heated arguments when you may need to take a break, but don’t try to solve your problems alone.

7. Say “I’m sorry” and really mean it. Even if you don’t mean it at first, saying sorry helps to soften hearts and rebuild bridges.

8. Avoid speaking ill of your spouse to family or close friends.

9. Retain the joy in your marriage. Most marriages begin with joy, and those that succeed retain it. When a marriage loses its happiness, it becomes weak and vulnerable. Husbands and wives who no longer laugh and play together are losing their love for each other and their capacity to stay together. True love includes a joyful, almost childlike quality. In other words, have fun.

10. Pray often.

BY HUGH W. PINNOCK, "Making a Marriage Work" February 1982

Fireproof Your Marriage through Acts of Service

This is an inspiring story of a couple whose marriage is at its end, they feel they don't love one another any longer and yet they find the strength to make it work and the love they once had by serving each other. Marriages require nurturing and care. Russel M. Nelson has taught that marriages can be strengthened by three action verbs; appreciate, communicate, and contemplate. Tell your spouse you love and appreciate them. To effectively communicate with your spouse you need to plan out time together to REALLY hear what the other person is saying. And take time to contemplate the covenants you have made to each other as husband and wife. Couples do not "fall out of love", they simply stop trying. Love is an action word enhanced through the action of service.

The Divorce Revolution

The divorce revolution—the steady displacement of a marriage culture by a culture of divorce and unwed parenthood—has failed. It has created terrible hardships for children, incurred unsupportable social costs, and failed to deliver on its promise of greater adult happiness. The time has come to shift the focus of national attention from divorce to marriage…. To reverse the current deterioration of child and societal well-being in the United States, we must strengthen the institution of marriage…. Strengthening marriage…. must become our most important goal. For unless we reverse the decline of marriage, no other achievements—no tax cut, no new government program, no new idea—will be powerful enough to reverse the trend of declining child well-being…. We call for the nation to commit itself to this overriding goal: To increase the proportion of children who grow up with their two married parents and decrease the proportion of children who do not… Who, today, is still promoting marriage? Who is even talking about it? In place of a national debate about what has happened to marriage there has been silence—stone-cold silence. (Council on Families in America (1995), Marriage in America: A report to the nation)