Mission Statements

Visit http://www.franklincovey.com/msb/ to build a personal or family mission statement. Mission statements can be great tools for families to focus on their goals and how they want to treat one another.

Successful families

Prospective successful families must have a destination in mind. We must decide what we want our family to be in the future. In other words, we need to work out a mission statement for our family. This mission statement should be arrived at with the consensus of members of the family, as this gives everyone the sense of ownership.

Secondly, to embark on this venture of successful family, it is imperative to build a “we” culture in the family. This would counter the individualism that is crippling family life nowadays. Instead of our natural inclination towards independence, we need to work towards inter-dependence. There is also the need to have regular family devotion and fellowship time. This is where the family talks about God and prays together, as well as to discuss family matters. This must also be supplemented by individual one-on-one parent and child bonding time.

Thirdly, is to work out a strategy together to guide the family to reach its intended destination. The family would then have a sense of direction and the will to overcome the rough terrains and storms of family life. Notwithstanding that there are always the unexpected obstacles, the family needs to be resilient and rise up to new challenges. This requires the shifting of paradigms and the learning of new life skills.

Fourthly, there is the need to set ground rules for fair practices. Among these rules, the most important is that of mutual respect). Regardless of whether one is the father or the eldest in the family, one must demonstrate mutual respect towards other members of the family. The parents, especially the fathers, have to be exemplary in respecting others so that the children can follow likewise. Mutual respect also requires one to display humility and have a “let us learn together” attitude. Family members must readily forgive one another whatever or whenever a wrong is committed).

Fifthly, achieving some measure of success. Complacency has ruined all great empires in the history of mankind. Similarly, patience is needed, as success often does not come by quickly. As with other great achievements, success only comes after much perseverance; those who have succeeded had been tenacious in their undertakings.

House of God

A House of Prayer and Fasting- Our families should gather for family prayer morning and night. In addition, we should offer our own individual prayers for our personal needs.

A House of Faith- We can make each home a house of faith by believing in the goodness of God and believing that we can live gospel principles and live in peace and security. We need to have the faith to be obedient, to keep trying, and to keep a positive outlook. S

A House of Learning and Glory-Every home is a house of learning, either for good or otherwise. Family members may learn to be obedient, honest, industrious, self-reliant, and faithful in living gospel principles, or they may learn something else. Learning the gospel in the homes of Church members should be centered on the scriptures and on the words of latter-day prophets. The ideal way to transform your home into a house of learning is to hold family home evening faithfully.

A House of Order- To instill order in our homes, parents should be in charge and exercise parental authority in righteous dominion and establish acceptable standards of behavior for their children, setting limits and adhering to them consistently. They are to teach and guide their children “by persuasion, by long-suffering, by gentleness and meekness, and by love unfeigned; by kindness, … reproving betimes with sharpness, when moved upon by the Holy Ghost; and then showing forth afterwards an increase of love.” (D&C 121:41–43.) Parents then will earn the respect of their children, and children will honor their parents, unifying families.

A House of God- If you will make your home a house of prayer and fasting, faith, learning and glory, and order, it can become a house of God. If you build your homes on the foundation rock of our Redeemer and the gospel, they can be sanctuaries where your families can be sheltered from the raging storms of life.

Joseph B. Wirthlin. “Spiritually Strong Homes and Families”. April 1993

A Proclamation to The World

Speaking of the proclamation, Elder M. Russell Ballard of the Quorum of the Twelve Apostles said, “It was then and is now a clarion call to protect and strengthen families and a stern warning in a world where declining values and misplaced priorities threaten to destroy society by undermining its basic unit”.

Based on gospel truths, the proclamation has been a guide in the home, the community, and world meetings concerning the family; a pillar of strength in political circles; a missionary tool; and a building block for greater Church emphasis on the family.

A Warning Ahead of Its Time

In modern society, where family values have deteriorated, the proclamation offers eternal truths concerning the importance of founding families on righteousness. The proclamation was issued before society at large recognized the extent of the decline of the family, said David C. Dollahite, professor in the School of Family Life at Brigham Young University.

The Proclamation serves as:

A Warning

A Guide for Families

A Call to World Leaders

A Compass for Research and Advocacy

A Banner to the World

Why Marriage Matters: Twenty-One Conclusions from the Social Sciences

Family

1. Marriage increases the likelihood that fathers have good relationships with their children.

2. Cohabitation is not the functional equivalent of marriage.

3. Growing up outside an intact marriage increases the likelihood that children will themselves divorce or become unwed parents.

4. Marriage is a virtually universal human institution.

Economics

5. Divorce and unmarried childbearing increase poverty for both children and mothers.

6. Married couples seem to build more wealth than singles or cohabiting couples.

7. Married men earn more money than do single men with similar education and job histories.

8. Parental divorce (or failure to marry) appears to increase children’s risk of school failure.

9. Parental divorce reduces the likelihood that children will graduate from college and achieve high-status jobs.

Physical Health and Longevity

10. Children who live with their own two married parents enjoy better physical health, on average, than do children in other family forms.

11. Parental marriage is associated with a sharply lower risk of infant mortality.

12. Marriage is associated with reduced rates of alcohol and substance abuse for both adults and teenage children.

13. Married people, especially married men, have longer life expectancies than do otherwise similar singles.

14. Marriage is associated with better health and lower rates of injury, illness, and disability for both men and women.

Mental Health and Emotional Well-Being

15. Children whose parents divorce have higher rates of psychological distress and mental illness.

16. Divorce appears significantly to increase the risk of suicide among both adults and their adolescent children.

17. Married mothers have lower rates of depression than do single or cohabiting mothers.

Crime and Domestic Violence

18. Boys raised in single-parent families are more likely to engage in delinquent and criminal behavior.

19. Marriage appears to reduce the risk that adults will be either perpetrators or victims of crime.

20. Married women appear to have a lower risk of experiencing domestic violence than do cohabiting or dating women.

21. A child who is not living with his or her own two married parents is at greater risk of child abuse. (http://www.americanvalues.org)

Thoughts on Marriage and Divorce

“The decision to divorce or remain together to work things out is one of the most important decisions you will ever make. It is crucial for those considering divorce to anticipate what lies ahead in order to make informed decisions. Too often the fallout from divorce is far more devastating than many people realize when contemplating the move.”- Michele Weiner-Davis ( Divorce Busting: A Revolutionary and Rapid Program for Staying Together (1992), 25.)

Researchers have asked this question:

“How many unhappy couples turn their marriages around? The truth is shocking: 86 percent of unhappily married people who stick it out find that, five years later, their marriages are happier, according to an analysis of the National Survey of Families and Households. … Most say they’ve become very happy indeed. In fact, nearly three-fifths of those who said their marriage was unhappy in the late ’80s and who stayed married rated this same marriage as either ‘very happy’ or ‘quite happy’ when interviewed again in the early 1990s.”

The same researchers concluded:

“Permanent marital unhappiness is surprisingly rare among couples who stick it out. Five years later, just 15 percent of those who initially said they were very unhappily married (and who stayed married) ranked their marriage as not [happy] at all.”